Freedom
I said earlier that when Don leaves the pictures on the dresser he is finally free.
What we know of Don Draper is that he was never free. “I didn’t think I had a choice,” he says of maintaining his disguise. A choiceless life is a prison.
As Dick Whitman, he was a whore-child, a slave to poverty and to social shame. He ran away to join the army, and that seemed like freedom to him (as it does to Greg Harris). Well, that didn’t work out, did it? (Foreshadowing for Greg?) He was free in Korea—to dig holes again. And maybe that wasn’t so bad, except very quickly he’s Don Draper, living a lie, and that brief stint in the army (which was horrific, what with the face-blowing-off fire and all) was the only time in his entire life that Dick Whitman/Don Draper has been free.
Until now.
Does it make him a better person? We don’t know. But it makes him free.
October 29th, 2009 at 8:32 am
I was thinking about this last night. Don is free but to what extent is Betty now a prisoner? Is being co-secret keeper going to be okay with her or will it be too much for her to take? I can’t wait to see how she handles this.
October 29th, 2009 at 8:58 am
Maybe Don and Betty are both still prisoners to their marriage the way it’s constructed. And if so, neither will be free until Don puts some more photos on the dresser. Photos of Midge and Rachel and Joy and Suzanne, etc.
October 29th, 2009 at 9:12 am
Lies imprison people while the truth is, potentially, liberating. By keeping the secret, Don took away Betty’s freedom. But now that she has, essentially, the truth she can no longer blame Don for her fate. They are both newly empowered and their marriage is a more equal partnership.
Betty has no one to blame anymore. She knows Don keeps secrets and tells stories and, most likely, will continue to do so. She also knows why and has tools for confronting him. If she still finds this relationship unacceptable, she has the power to free herself of it. No one can do that for her.
October 29th, 2009 at 9:30 am
Well maybe, we’ll see if Betty decides to exert any control. Not sure if that is her style, but she could. Still, I can imagine this making things worse…the lies are pretty great and it doesn’t change that Don is still comfortable lying. Betty isn’t really a liar, despite other faults.
October 29th, 2009 at 9:31 am
I’ve thought of Don more as an escaped prisoner, a fugitive. A fugitive is not free either. He must always be ready to run, as Don always has been. Now that the past has finally caught him, that fear is gone, so he is free in that regard.
If we are to think of Don as a prisoner, his waiting room talk with the prison guard in The Fog might be very interesting to review, particularly if, as some theorized, it was actually a fantasy/dream, a conversation that Don was having with himself.
October 29th, 2009 at 9:46 am
Somehow I don’t think the biggest lies in Don & Betty’s relationship are about his past. They’re about his present- all the cheating he’s done over the years. He still hasn’t come clean about that. And just admitting that he’s been “disrespectful” doesn’t quite cut it, by a long shot.
Maybe Betty has some leverage now to make him admit to his infidelity. But in threatening Don with exposure, she’s taking a risk in losing everything she has now too – the money, the house, the social standing — which I think are still very important to her, even they don’t completely fulfill her as a person. We know she knows about the cheating on one level (she admitted it to Dr Blabby in S1), but how much does she want to know? Does she really want ALL the awful details of exactly how unfaithful he’s been to her? The truth is pretty devastating – he started sometime arund when Sally was born, maybe earlier, and he’s continued it right up through today. If Don DOES confess all that, she has to decide what she’s going to do about it. That’s a pretty big burden in and of itself.
“Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose” – Betty still has lots to lose.
Like Helen said “The hardest part is realizing you’re in charge.”
October 29th, 2009 at 10:08 am
My mother-in-law divorced her lying, cheating ad exec husband in 1964 when the youngest of their six kids was just a baby. It took many, many affairs for her to get there, but, eventually, enough was enough. Never occurred to me that she had to prove the infidelity. That’s interesting to me.
The “big reveal” is really just the beginning of Don’s/Dick’s quest for freedom. His hidden past is actually far less damning than his lying present. So how will Betty handle the next blow, and the next and the next? Until it finally ALL comes out, he’s still a prisoner of his own charade. It’s why I believe Suzanne truly represented freedom to him. Will Betty be able to embrace his past and forgive his current transgressions? I think Suzanne could and I believe he sensed that. At this point in the story, he is still far from a free man.
October 29th, 2009 at 10:17 am
If Suzanne could forgive him, it’s she hasn’t lived through 10+ years of him cheating on and lying to HER. Let’s see how she does after a 10 year history of being lied to and humiliated. I bet she wouldn’t be so free-spirited then.
I agree LL that it’s the lying present, not the tortured past, that is most troubling.
Does Don even know how to live his life truthfully? The lies come so easily…
He’s got a long, long way to go.
October 29th, 2009 at 10:18 am
damn you, incompetent editor! “….it’s BECAUSE she hasn’t…”
October 29th, 2009 at 10:31 am
I would really like to bury the notion that Don did not admit infidelity. Both Don and Betty clearly understood “disrespectful” as an admission. Matt said he wrote it that way because he wanted Don to chose a word that both confessed and also did not burden Betty with ugly details. Not “I fucked around,” or “I had sex,” both of which would have been admissions but more painful to listen to.
It’s not how *I* would wish to hear it, but as long as both Drapers understand and agree to its meaning, it serves as a truth-telling.
And obviously, Suzanne in the car during the confession serves to taint its “total” honesty. Yet I think for Don, this was a much bigger lie than the cheating, and much more important.
October 29th, 2009 at 10:50 am
I don’t read or hear everything Matt says, so I’m left to draw my own conclusions, but if Matt says they accepted and moved on, I’m willing to see it that way. Regardless; I think for DON the big lie is his past & his identity theft, but for Betty I think the continuing infidelity has a bigger corrosive effect, because that’s the part that most affects their relationship. He might have confessed that he was disrespectful and Betty took that as enough admission about his past affairs, but how is she going to feel about on-going “disrespect?”
It would be one thing if his previous confession signaled the end of his philandering, putting it all in the past. But that’s not what’s going on here.
He’s still living a lie. He ain’t free yet.
October 29th, 2009 at 10:54 am
I think Betty can explore her feelings for Henry now. She can keep the house and social standing and have a discreet relationship on the side. And I wonder if it is possible the addictive need to screw around will cease because the impulse was driven by the stress of his secrets and low self worth?
October 29th, 2009 at 10:58 am
I thought the closest he came to being free before Sunday was when he was with Anna. “The Mountain King” was really the first time we had seen him be completely open, honest with his problems, and free of his Don Draper persona. Until his showdown with Betty, his talks with Anna were probably the only ones in years in which he never had to lie in some way.
That may not be complete freedom, but it had probably been the closest he had been to it in his whole life. And even with his newfound freedom at home – however long that may last – he’s still not completely free at work, especially after signing that contract. So he might only be halfway free in the larger picture.
October 29th, 2009 at 11:08 am
robert – I want Anna to pay a long visit to Ossining! Don & Betty need her in their lives.
Susan F- it will be interesting to see if Don’s need to philander (I’m falling in love with that word) dissipates. Maybe!
October 29th, 2009 at 11:09 am
I have a feeling Betty is going to try to prove adultery so that she can obtain a divorce in the coming episode by following Don from a distance (or maybe having him followed?), and that Suzanne Farell will give her more than enough evidence.
October 29th, 2009 at 11:10 am
I’m of the impression also that the secrets of the Shoebox of Horror aren’t as ultimately significant or threatening to Don’s sense of self as he has appeared to have always believed. They’re just memories of a past, and if he would only look around for a minute, he would realize that he knows those memories cannot damage his sense of identity.
Don Draper knows this instinctually. He showed us this with his acuity at assessing the dog food problem. Sure it’s horse meat but all dog food is horse meat. Dogs like it, it’s good for them, it’s a good product that perfectly serves its purpose. There’s nothing wrong with its form or function: it is perfect in that sense and context. The only problem is the perception of others; the label put on the outside.
As a metaphor for the struggle of human consciousness (or soul if you prefer) to accept itself for what it is, it is a tasty one, methinks.
Don needs to see that he’s not an inner and outer self; he’s not Dick and Don; he’s not even really afflicted. He’s just human. Worm food. Horse meat. Dog food. He serves his purpose well.
Whatever you label us, we just is.
Also, that’s an interesting tidbit Deborah about MW’s choice of “disrespectful”. I saw that as confession by euphemism, by sales pitch, pure Don for sure and he knows his consumer, Betty will kind of get it. But wasn’t that more strictly focused on Betty’s first-hand knowledge of just Bobbie? Do we really think she had any suspicion of Midge for five+ years? And that was acceptable to her? And disrespectful covered it all?
gypsy- copyeditors are born to be fired.
October 29th, 2009 at 11:12 am
Also robert- I wonder if the contract was only a problem when Don felt he needed to be able to run away. Maybe that’s not so much of an issue for him now either?
(Well, until Duck comes back as his boss or something.)
Either way, 3 years just isn’t that long a time, even if it seems like an eternity to Dick Whitman. BTW, would the non-compete extend past the 3 year contract period, if he chose not to renew? I’m not sure how that generally works.
October 29th, 2009 at 11:20 am
less of me- With the possible exception of some kind of legal trouble as a result of his desertion, I never felt Don’s job was jeopardized by his past, although clealry HE did. He took a guy’s name, but the talent and hard work and creativity are all his own. He didn’t steal that from anyone. Apparently he didn’t even fake his resume – Roger knows he was a guy working for a fur company and going to night school. We can assume Roger saw some flash of brilliance within Don – a diamond in the rough –and brought him over to SC. His greatest fear truly resided in anticipation – it was all shadows on the wall.
And I agree about the cheating- I doubt Betty has any idea how extensive it was, and I’m SURE she doesn’t know it’s still going on. That’s a horse of a different color.
October 29th, 2009 at 11:31 am
Don is still playing the role of Don, even with Betty. The doll house they set up together still isn’t fulfilling for either one of them, regardless of whether Betty now knows his past. I seriously doubt that someone of Betty’s upbringing is just going to suck this one up. Her whole assessment of Don is going to undergo a very large adjustment. Frankly, I don’t think she’s magnanimous enough to accept Dick, or to lie to the world for him.
Besides which, how would you feel if you found out that, while your husband was giving you this big confession speech, his latest girlfriend was waiting outside? Don is still Don, he’s still gonna cheat. He will still cheat because he’s not doing it because of his secret past (which is still secret to almost everyone), but because his new life as Don is also a lie.
October 29th, 2009 at 11:43 am
how would you feel if you found out that, while your husband was giving you this big confession speech, his latest girlfriend was waiting outside?
I’m not sure a vase to the back of the head would be quite do it.
October 29th, 2009 at 11:57 am
gypsy, interesting as always:
I don’t read or hear everything Matt says, so I’m left to draw my own conclusions, but if Matt says they accepted and moved on, I’m willing to see it that way.
I’m not sure I want to say “accepted and moved on.” I just mean that both Betty & Don clearly understood “I was disrespectful” as “I cheated.” It doesn’t make it okay, it just means it was an acceptable euphemism.
Regardless; I think for DON the big lie is his past & his identity theft, but for Betty I think the continuing infidelity has a bigger corrosive effect,
Yes and no. Obviously, she hates that he cheats and it is incredibly destructive. But at some level, she also always knew and accepted, then realized that she always knew and stopped accepting, then chose to take him back when she became pregnant, knowing at some level that he was still and would remain a cheat.
And remember, these were men who commonly accepted cheating. It’s the old double-standard. It’s not true that everyone cheats, but many do, and this is something you can deal with. You can hate it, you can kick the guy out, you can shoot him, but you also understand it; it’s a thing that happens in a marriage.
But the box is different. The box is a fundamental falsehood that colors every moment of the marriage. Betty’s best friend also has a cheating husband, but Carlton is who he says he is; Francine knows to whom she’s married.
how is she going to feel about on-going “disrespect?”
No question she will hate it.
He’s still living a lie. He ain’t free yet.
Here I disagree. I think this is a lie that he thinks of as “normal;” it is not different than the lie any married man who cheats lives. But the secret identity is not “normal.” It requires a whole different level of vigilance. That’s the difference.
October 29th, 2009 at 12:03 pm
gypsy- we agree as we often do.
The Bert Cooper business model is certainly accepting of just about any indiscretions as long as Don is an asset to the bottom line. This is fundamental Rand.
The fraud element is negligible for the reasons you mentioned. He really only took the name. The military would probably want him the most.
And the danger of the exposure of the crime is there but only from Betty. And if Betty pursues that she endangers all the material upside Don provides. She’s sharp enough to see that pursuit doesn’t work for anyone, especially the kids, and if not then it isn’t a practical threat. Don will see this too I think.
(clap,clap) gypsy blending the Plato with the Balzac!! extra points from me!
October 29th, 2009 at 12:37 pm
“Will Betty be able to embrace his past and forgive his current transgressions? I think Suzanne could and I believe he sensed that. At this point in the story, he is still far from a free man.”
I don’t think so. He already has a lie hanging over him about Suzanne’s brother. How would she react if she ever found out that he had lied about her brother?
October 29th, 2009 at 12:45 pm
Hmmmmm, deborah. That’s an interesting point about the “normative” nature of Don’s lies about his infidelities. Hadn’t thought of it that way.
I’ll have a think on that!
“I don’t even know who you are” “Yes you do.”
October 29th, 2009 at 12:52 pm
“Don Draper” as performed by Dick Whitman is still not someone who is satisfied with life. He doesn’t cheat on his wife because of a secret about his past. His life is complex and it’s a construct, regardless of that past. The whole point of this show is the masks we wear and the pain it causes us to wear those masks. The Don/Dick dichotomy is not the real mask of Don.
Everyone on this show is wearing a costume, everyone on this show is living a lie, to a certain extent. Don/Dick has never been the point and just telling one person, albeit his wife, does not free Don from anything substantive.
October 29th, 2009 at 1:25 pm
Re #17: “BTW, would the non-compete extend past the 3 year contract period, if he chose not to renew?”
I’m not sure what was SOP in 1963 but current non-compete clauses that I’ve seen in contracts have to do with not taking any clients with you after you leave the agency, for some stipulated period of time (often 1 year or more).
It’s all about stealing business from an old employer and taking it to a new one (or starting your own agency and taking clients with you).
October 29th, 2009 at 1:27 pm
Re #16: But wasn’t that more strictly focused on Betty’s first-hand knowledge of just Bobbie? Do we really think she had any suspicion of Midge for five+ years?
We don’t know how much Betty knew, or sensed, at the time the show started – but we know her hands shook; we saw her reaction when she spotted the cuff links Rachel gave Don; her response to Francine’s finding of evidence via the phone bill was to immediately start her own search. She knew, even before she knew she knew.
Also, of course she’ll be furious if she finds out about Suzanne, but things have changed since she found out about Bobbie. Yes, he admitted “disrespect,” and apologies imply (or are supposed to imply) the desire not to repeat the transgression – but meanwhile Betty herself boffed the guy in the bar and pursued Henry. She even bought a fainting couch to lie on and fantasize about Henry in her own (and Don’s own) living room. I’m not saying that levels the playing field, but it does change the dynamic.
Then again, they’re both good at denial and compartmentalizing.
October 29th, 2009 at 1:30 pm
on AMC MM site there is a copy of Don’s contract, I have not read it.
http://blogs.amctv.com/photo-galleries/mad-men-season-3-scrapbook/don-draper-contract.php
October 29th, 2009 at 1:37 pm
#28, I saw it yesterday – it’s the first page only so nothing that I saw about the noncompete, but Don is raking in some serious coin. $75k a year in 1963!
Thanks for explanation Seymour- that makes complete sense.
October 29th, 2009 at 1:38 pm
The AMC site shows only the first page of the contract, which doesn’t include the non-compete.
October 29th, 2009 at 1:49 pm
Betty knew and accepted Don’s infidelity, even though she didn’t like it. Initially, Don at least kept it very separate from their lives and she could ignore it. It wasn’t until Bobbie, someone she knew, and someone she thought everyone else knew about, that she got angry about it. And, she was angry about the humiliation of it more than anything. Given that Bobbie wasn’t someone who interacted with her children and whom she’d have to see any possible time she was at their school, I can’t imagine how Betty could ever accept Don’s recklessness and utter lack of respect for his family in bedding Sally’s teacher.
October 29th, 2009 at 1:53 pm
#7 LL, amazing story about your mother-in-law. But her experience calls to mind what people who practice law know: it varies, even now, from state to state.
Family law in New York state is still different from it is in, say, California. I live in a community property state; it is possible, even mundane, to get a “no-fault divorce” here. In New York, divorce is considerably more problematic.
But I think that all of this is still beside the point. People who are awake to life and its patterns know that what they do comes back to them, always. Always.
For Don, telling Betty the truth of what’s in the box does not really free him of what he’s done. He has still done it. Each of them still is who he and she is: the man and the woman who married a cardboard-cutout symbol of hope, and are now finding out what it means to be married to someone you don’t know and often don’t like.
Being alive in the world means seeing what you have done played out in front of you again and again, being helpless to change it, and caring deeply about everyone involved. It means learning from your mistakes so much and so often that you can never forget, no matter how hard you try, where you really came from.
An integrated life means penance. I think Don is about to learn this.
October 29th, 2009 at 1:54 pm
Speaking of prisons: I was looking at the website for the Norwich Inn, where Suzanne wanted Don to take her, and I noticed on their history page that after WWII the place went into a steep decline, and at its lowest point “the basement was used as a holding tank for overflow prisoners from the police department.”
Suzanne wanted to take him to jail!
You know, just because they’ve had “the talk” doesn’t mean they’re out of the woods yet. Betty’s confronted with a choice, to become a grownup or not; but it’s not clear at all that that’s what she’s going to do. It’s also not at all clear that Don is going to be Mr. Terrific from now on now that his secret’s out. He still has a lifetime of living a lie determining his character; and she could very well still be leaving, if she decides she can’t cope with a philanderer (or worse, a former member of the lower classes).
October 29th, 2009 at 2:02 pm
Re: Don and lying.
Is it pathological, or does he have the capacity at this time to stop lying?
October 29th, 2009 at 2:05 pm
With freedom comes responsibility. I’m not sure that this opening of the box won’t end up putting more walls around Don. Maybe it will be security for him. Maybe he’ll hate it.
Before, Don was able to compartmentalize his life and lead the Don Draper life, while still having the freedom at home to come and go as he pleased. I’m not sure Betty’s going to be so supportive of that now. She’s definitely in an entirely new position of power in the marriage. And there is always the distant, but possible threat of the law coming after Don.
I have no idea where Weiner is going to take this. But it opens up an incredible amount of storyline possibility and I can’t wait to see how it plays out.
October 29th, 2009 at 2:07 pm
if she decides she can’t cope with a philanderer (or worse, a former member of the lower classes).
I’m wondering how much the ‘poverty-whorechild’ part will bother Betty. Is she that much of a snob? She married a guy “with no people” who was working as a copywriter at a fur company and going to night school. A guy who by her own admission didn’t understand money.
If socioeconomic status was really that important to her, surely she could have picked up a nice Yalie or Princeton grad with a monied pedigree.
I could just as easily see Betty admiring Don for being a self-made man (Oh, if only she knew how true that was!).
I’m trying to figure out for myself which parts of his story are really devastating to her, beyond the mere fact that he’s been lying about it.
What do you folks think?
October 29th, 2009 at 2:14 pm
Gypsy, I think it definitely bothers her. I think when she was looking at Don weep on the bed she was seeing that she will need to overcome her own snobbishness in order to make this work. That’s part of her coming out of her princess coma. Self-awareness is hard, but necessary for growth. Betty’s frozen, but she’s not stupid; she is seeing who she is as well as who he is.
Will she decide to stick with Don and grow together? I don’t think it’s a given either way. I think Don can make that decision for her if he contacts Suzanne again, or even if he doesn’t. Suzanne could split this marriage with a wink at this point.
October 29th, 2009 at 2:17 pm
Gypsy,
I don’t think Betty’s nearly the snob she’s often imagined to be. Which doesn’t mean to say she doesn’t have her moments, but…
Surely a woman who looked like Betty and came from money could have married just about any eligible young man on the Main Line. She didn’t choose a mate from that pool. She went to college. She moved to Manhattan to work.
She fell in love with a mysterious guy, she knew was poor, who she was really hot for. And, she went against her parents wishes to do so.
In the confrontation scenes she was much more upset at the Anna divorce papers than she was about the family photos. And there was a direct cut to Betty’s face when Don admitted his mother was a prostitute, and she didn’t flinch or look horrified.
If Betty can’t live with Don, I don’t think it will be because he was poor or a “whore child”.
October 29th, 2009 at 2:26 pm
Aran, I tend to agree, and that’s why I think for Betty, the biggest most devastating lie has yet to be revealed. I think she took the rest of it in stride. The Anna part bothered her the most (as it was most directly related to her relationship with Don) , but Don’s explanation seems to have satisfied her. Like you said fnarf – an ill-timed wink from Suzanne could bring this crashing down.
And it may be that Betty figures out that not all of her unhappiness is the result of Don’s lying.
October 29th, 2009 at 2:28 pm
Snobbishness, like all human emotions, works in mysterious ways. “I’ve seen how you are with money; you don’t understand it” — that tells you everything you need to know. Betty obviously knows that Don is from outside her class, but not HOW FAR outside — she thought he was a “football player who hated his dad”. There’s no way on earth this isn’t a factor in her thinking right now, whatever she decides.
October 29th, 2009 at 2:39 pm
Snobbery isn’t all about wealth either. There are a lot of poor snobs. It’s more about being judgemental and using something, or an association, to preserve your standing within, or aspiration to a group.
I didn’t see Betty’s money comment to be snobbish, but a simple fact. People who grow up in financial security have a very different relationship with money than those who don’t. While Betty didn’t grow up an heiress, she was upper middle class and had a very comfortable life. But her father was likely self-made himself and I’d bet Don has a greater net worth than her father had.
It might concern Betty if Don were to ask if Archie and Abigail could move in with them, but Don’s people are dead. It’s only memories and stories for her.
October 29th, 2009 at 2:47 pm
# 32 Anne B. – It is scary and a little hard to admit how much my real life mirrors this show. I have first hand experience in just about every aspect of it. It’s like my life played out 45 years earlier (but with better clothes and hair!) I gave my mother-in-law the S1 DVD’s to watch. She watched the whole first season and then said she couldn’t watch anymore. Too close to home. My philandering father in law, Donald the ad exec (I kid you not) ended up being married four different times. After his last wife left, he lived alone for many years and then had a massive stroke (in line at the grocery store!!) three years ago at age 72. It didn’t kill him, but he can no longer speak or care for himself. He sits in a diaper all day in a nursing home. Karma? Penance? Don Draper, beware.
Gypsy, Aran – I’m totally with you. If/when the Suzanne affair smacks Betty in the face, probably at school, probably in front of Francine, I believe we’ll then be able to anticipate a confrontation that will make G&H’s look like a walk in the park.
October 29th, 2009 at 2:54 pm
Laura Lynn: Thanks for sharing your story.
But please don’t assume that everybody “in a diaper all day in a nursing home” somehow deserves it.
October 29th, 2009 at 2:55 pm
Perhaps marrying Don was an act of rebellion for Betty. We know her father never liked him, didn’t approve of Betty’s choices. It’s possible now that Gene is dead and Betty is a grown up woman with children of her own, those attitudes will come back into play. Or, those underlying snobberies could simply tip the scales when she finds out about Suzanne. You know she’s going to freak when she finds out.
October 29th, 2009 at 3:37 pm
I looked at Don’s contract too and interestingly it’s not as binding as he made it sound – or felt it was; perhaps he didn’t read it at all. There’s an out for both Don and SC. According to the terms listed, either party can terminate, Don with 3 months’ notice and SC with 6 months’ notice.
October 29th, 2009 at 3:49 pm
I think Betty knowingly married a non- Ivy league, non- Main- Line man, because she really loved him, and in doing so, upset Gene, who she loved and was cherished by. She chose husband over family. She’s a snob but overcame it for him.
On the other hand, I wonder if Dick Whitman- without being Don Draper- would have found her attractive, or even loved her.
She was an ornament for his alter ego- but I don’t think she was ever a real live person. He never aknowledged her as that- just as an object to complete his facade.
October 29th, 2009 at 3:49 pm
I think Betty is not as snobby as people may think -but she is a narcisist. Don isn’t poor anymore. They have a beautiful home, cars, money, clothes, jewelry. The past doesn’t affect her directly, so I doubt she cares too much about it.
October 29th, 2009 at 3:56 pm
One thing I think is interesting is to remember what Betty has always been good at- playing cards. She was always pictured with all the cards at the end of the game.
I see her eventually blackmailing him for custody, a house- not in Ossining- and every penny he’s worth.
October 29th, 2009 at 3:57 pm
She was an ornament for his alter ego- but I don’t think she was ever a real live person. He never aknowledged her as that- just as an object to complete his facade.
But when he visited Anna in the flashback–to get his “divorce”–he was in love. At least, Anna thought so.
October 29th, 2009 at 4:13 pm
“But when he visited Anna in the flashback–to get his “divorce”–he was in love. At least, Anna thought so.”
I think you are right- he did seem very in love- (but he did dwell on her beauty and education).
It just seemed like she never really “did it” for him, whereas she seemed to want more of him- all of him, and his elusiveness was a continued source of her frustration and anger.
I hope that you are correct and MW will resolve things so that he really loves her, and it has been his fear of rejection and self- loathing that drove him to stray… but when I see MW interviewed, he seems to have a pretty negative view of their marriage- that it is empty and based on falsehood.
October 29th, 2009 at 4:13 pm
Don is free-er. He’s not free. That’s what “Seven Twenty-Three” was about. He’s locked into a contract. He’s (supposedly) committed to his family. And it’s much harder to go hobo now that Betty knows his secrets.
October 29th, 2009 at 4:50 pm
Yeah, Don got locked into the contract because Bert Cooper already knows Don’s secret (and because Pete found out before him). When people find out about Don, it doesn’t necessarily lead to freedom. Now that Betty knows the truth, it’s already led to Don cutting off his relationship with Suzanne – his freedom is being further curtailed. Is there more in store?
October 29th, 2009 at 5:10 pm
I watch this show with this thought in the back of my mind all the time.. “its the 60s”. Stuff happened then that was considered normal and just the way things were. The fact that adultery was more accepted as something that just happened is a truism. Adultery still happens but because of the changes in the laws and civil (human) rights we’re more able to out the offending betrayer. Less tolerance for it and such.
I feel Don cheats because he’s an amoral man. He wasn’t raised with a solid moral compass, by examples of love and commitment and honor. I remember a scene at the birthday party when Don catches one of the couples in the dining room being tender with each other. I got a feeling from him in that scene that the image he was processing was something he didn’t really understand but possibly longed for.
I think he’s trying to be a moral man, he’s just having to do it by himself and a man alone in any time has a hard time asking for help or even acknowledging that wow I have a problem.
I know a lot of the discussion regarding Don is bound in some way to freedoms and truth. I just feel the truth is he wasn’t raised in the best of circumstances so he’s a product of that.
Hope this made some sense.
October 29th, 2009 at 7:19 pm
I see how Don is free of the secret he was hiding from Betty, but my first reaction during the confession Betty extracted from him was that he was now beholden to *her* (in addition to Anna) as the keeper of that secret. As she points out (undoubtedly for a different reason), taking Draper’s identity is illegal. If she is bound to him by her desire to maintain her standard of living (home, livelihood, children), he is now beholden to her to … keep him out of prison, as it were. Betty would probably never report him out of concern for herself and her family, but this is a woman who would shoot the neighbor’s birds, manipulate her girlfriend into adultery and toy with an 8-year-old boy’s affection, so who knows?!
October 29th, 2009 at 7:40 pm
He is “beholden”to her, and I think she would/ will maintain her silence- until the Suzanne secret is outed. His having sex with Suzanne is awful, but for Betty, I think, it pales in comparison to how she will feel that her family will be fodder for gossip in the whole town. Esp if the kids are talking in school.
Then all bets are off- and he’s either looking at jail, or signing over all his assets to her.