Last night I took a late bus home from the Port Authority out to New Jersey. I’d had a ridiculously long week at work, and this particular Friday was beyond intense. But I managed to run out the door at 7:15 in time to get to the theater to see Reasons To Be Pretty before it closes this weekend.
Great play, fun time with a co-worker, and four celebrity sightings–a personal best. (Olympia Dukakis, Wilson Cruz, Amy Aquino, and John Shea.)
From there a quick stop at a club where a band I knew was playing and other friends were gathering. And I mean quick stop; I still managed to get to an 11:40 bus.
So I was in a really nice mood, but beyond exhausted.
And the bus got taken over by a very large group of Yankee fans. And from the moment they boarded and into the ride, they were loud and obnoxious. And in the aisle, as we’d gone into standing room. And I mean YELLING. I actually had to hang up from the call I was on because of the loud.
Eventually they quieted down to a degree. But one young guy just kept making trouble.
I can’t tell you what he finally did. I know this story will be confusing without this information, but I just can’t. But he did something. And he thought he was funny, and his friends (who were not all young, btw) thought he was funny, and I did not think he was funny. It offended and upset me. A lot.
And I really did, I’m not kidding, wish that Don Draper were there to defend me. Because you don’t act that way in front of a lady. And someone oughtta teach this guy some manners.
14 Responses to “Don on the elevator”
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I'm really sorry that happened to you. If it makes you feel any better, if I'd have been there I would've told him to STFU. Not all of us whippersnappers are asshats.
I took the bus into/out of Port Authority yesterday but earlier, so it was more of a sedate crowd. Plus I have my anti-social behavior set-up for public transportation: My iPod….LOL
Speaking as someone who works in NYC – and commutes home to the burbs every night… been there! Ranger fans, Yankee fans, Mets fans, Knicks fans – all drunk and loud and completely out of control. You can't say anything because you are completely outnumbered – and as a girl – it can feel a little scary.
I've often wondered why someone (the ages are older than you'd expect … 30 – 60) doesn't tell them to calm down – there are children and women around.
Don Draper is the MAN. He is. I wonder why men can't summon up their "inner Don Draper" – man-up, grow a spine and SAY SOMETHING when things are rough…
"wonder why men can’t summon up their “inner Don Draper†– man-up, grow a spine and SAY SOMETHING when things are rough…"
I think it may have something to do with our road-rage society…people are too quick to pull a knife or gun on someone.
It was very scary. I was so stressed that they were getting off at my stop, all 15 of them–my stop being a park and ride (just like a chip and dip, only completely different) and all empty and stuff. I considered just staying on the bus, but as we approached it I got that they were going further.
That's awful. Yeah, I think it's the general reaction NOT to react, because who knows who's a psycho.
Glad you made it out of the situation okay. That is really scary stuff.
I think that is the main reason the rest of the US doesn't want to be dependent on public transportation.
Once again, I'm very glad you are safe now. BTW, my husband is the guy who would say something to them and make them feel ashamed. He's good at that.
Roberta: I'm sorry we were not commuting together. I would have used a Tony Soprano line, "you kiss your mother with that mouth?". Then again, I look like I'm from the cast of the Sopranos.
Its one thing to reprimand a bunch of frat boy junior executives on an elevator and quite another to throw down on some drunk (or worse) a-hole on the subway with a bunch of his buddies cheering him on. Unfortunately, people like this have no role models and have never been told "no". It is a disrespect of everyone, not just women. While it may feel good to put this jerk in his place, I ask that you be real careful if you do next time. Or sit next to me on the train.
Thanks, Frank. It was a bus, so moving closer to the driver (who was aware of the rowdy but not the crude) seemed like an okay move. But I am sometimes reckless with standing up for myself.
Really folks, thank you.
Roberta: I missed the bus reference. Smart move getting next to the driver.
In the bigger scheme of things, people like the one you described are truly pathetic and deserve our pity at best. Their antics are a sign of their desperation – if they didn't act like an a-hole, no one would notice them. Next time, if you carry a compact, hand it over to them and say "you should see how desperate you look".
I've seen how tough you are on this blog. I, for one, wouldn't f*ck with you. Be safe.
Frank, sometimes standing up and saying "How dare you!" in an indignant voice is effective. But well, there are risks.
In 1987 I was coming out of the subway station near my office when a man behind me started saying what he'd like to do to me in very…clear…terms. It was all I could do to hold my temper and not turn around and snap his head off. But you never know what the result will be.
A year later, a woman was murdered at that subway station at that time of day.
I'm so sorry that a good night had to end in such a rotten way. but I hope that enough time has passed that it's not terrible of me to giggle a bit as I imagine a new sort of superhero who, where Clark Kent ripped off his gray flannel suit to become a hero, rips off his outer layer to REVEAL a gray flannel suit to become Secret Don Draper come to the rescue.
Glad you're o.k. Roberta. The occasional pack of loud drunk teens/ early 20 somethings on the Metro-north are bad enough, but older people should know how to act better.
I was so pleased once when this kid (who was with like 20 people) got kicked off the train for not having a ticket or cash and trying to start something with the conductor. His friend decided to go with him.
What's even better is that they got kicked off at 125th and they seemed like the exact kind of obnoxious suburban teenage white boys who'd have pre-conceptions about being in Harlem at midnight. I was laughing my ass off internally.
Roberta. This is awful.
FYI, I contacted the Yankees organization about this. Let me know if you'd also like me to talk to a friend of mine who covers the Yankees for the Daily News. Anthony's a good guy, and the father of two little girls. I am sure he wouldn't mind clarifying what responsible fan behavior is — and is not.
I take public transit everywhere, and while it can be a good idea to stand up for other passengers who are being harassed during the ride, it is ultimately the driver's responsibility. Here in SF, I've seen drivers radio the police, even pull off the road and deal with the guys themselves.
Once, I saw a driver go after a gang of young guys with a tire iron he kept behind his seat. They ran like hell.
The driver of your bus was aware of what was going on behind him, I am sure. He should have dealt with it, instead of letting that element continue their harassment from one place to another. If he was anything like bus drivers here, he had to pick them up — but he didn't have to keep them on.
We all like to think there's something we can do about bad behavior in public. Some can do more than others, though. They just don't.