Dec 112008
Perfect timing, Ma just left
In A Night To Remember, this is Anita’s opening line to Peggy. They sit and they chat, and Anita complains.
But here’s the thing. It is a warm exchange. And… clean. It did not teem with harbored resentments. “Perfect timing, Ma just left” was entirely inclusive; Anita was commiserating with her sister.
So I’m thinking, as nasty as her motives may have been when she did it, the confession that we witnessed in Three Sundays was good for Anita’s soul.
22 Responses to “Perfect timing, Ma just left”
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We just watched this epi last night. At the end of that scene I imagine Peggy is thinking “sure, perfect timing! Now I have to do this stupid flyer for Father Doofus!”
This epi is why Jan got nominated, I’m thinking. I remember this epi as the one where S2 really got strange. If Betty can grow a spine, anything is possible.
I haven’t seen this in a while, but I did pick up resentment there. Anita is not commiserating, she is feeling stuck at home with the kids and supervised by Ma while Peggy is free to come and go to Manhattan, with her ponytail and perfect timing.
Anita is playing “Betty” to Peggy’s “Don.” I think that’s why many of us inferred she is raising Peggy’s kid too. Ma also seems to favor Peggy — upward mobility provides a kind of absolution that trumps the confessional. On some level, I think Anita confessed for Peggy because she knows Peggy never will. Father Gill’s dance poster is the only penance he can mete out.
Anita is a good foil for us to see how selfish Peggy can be.
I think there might be a little resentment and a little admiration mixed together in Anita’s exchange with Peggy in that scene. It reminds me of the conversations I now have with one of my brothers as we discuss the care for our elderly mother. Its mostly about commiserating now and while the resentments are there (he cares for her more than I, the daughter, who “should” be doing it), it’s mixed with humor and a shared sense of how unpleasant it all is.
I feel for Anita though, she tries to laugh it off. She’s not sure how to navigate this relationship with Peggy. Peggy has become someone alien to that family and they don’t really know what to do with her. Anita, in particular. That’s really why it rings so true to me to see the mother shower praise on Peggy and for Anita to feel this awkward resentment, mixed with admiration and love.
She’s also got a husband on the couch. Malingerer or really injured, that ain’t a fun scenario.
I didn’t mean to say there was no resentment. Of course there are resentments; they’re sisters.
(just kidding.)
All I’m saying is that the resentments, the jealousies; they seemed right-sized for sisters. It was lighter, it was loving, it was normal. I really really think that her confession did her some actual good.
I agree with you, Roberta, that’s the thing between siblings, you share the family stuff and likely a few resentments, but carry on regardless. The confession was an act of frustration on a bad day. PMS, maybe? I never thought Anita was out to hurt Peggy by getting that off her chest. The confessional, after all, is meant to be sacred and, therefore, private.
So, I guess what I meant to say that the real violator was Father Gil, not Anita.
I don't see Peggy as all that selfish. She brings colored pencils for the kids and goes to the library for her brother-in-law. She's thinking of her family and visits them often. Plus she puts up with endless cluelessness of Father Gil.
I took the "perfect timing" comment the same way as Roberta, as two sisters commiserating about mom.
I doubt either Olsen daughter is always pleased with the way their mother treats them. While Anita may feel like Peggy is favored, Peggy may feel that their mother's current attitude is coddling. Last season the only bit of the relationship seen between Peggy and her mother was her mother encouraging her to date the truck driver. Presumably she visited home enough not to need to call much. All of which means that there was some difference in their relationship before and that Mrs. Olsen might have some guilt in not being able to notice/talk about her daughter's pregnancy until she was hospitalized.
Peggy's pregnancy has changed their relationship. The physical manifestation of the change is gone, but that does not mean that it is possible to pretend it did not happen. They don't really have a way to talk about it either. Anita's confession demonstrates that they only way she can understand her sister's situation is as something bad. Even knowing her sister as a not bad person only mitigates it so far. So yes the confession probably relieve a fair amount of tension, probably in a tough week.
This thread reminds me of a strange sibling dynamic seen throughout the series. Over and over, we have a family with two kids, one of whom is favored over the other (with the less favored often harboring some nasty resentment). Here are a few instances, with the less-favored sibling listed first:
Bobby and Sally Draper
Betty's brother (name?) and Betty
Anita and Peggy Olsen
Pete and Pete's brother (name?)
Dick and Adam Whitman
Because the dynamic occurs so often, I doubt this is a coincidence. But I can't quite see why they keep coming back to this type of relationship again and again, except for the fact that it's inherently dramatic.
Any thoughts?
Sibling issues are unavoidable. We like to think that we grow up and change, but that doesn't usually happen to the degree we'd like it to. The relationship that you have with your siblings can change over time, but certian fundamental aspects remain the same, especially if there is a favorite child. The only way to escape is to do what Dick Whitman did: make a complete break and become a completly different person.
I had a thought about Peggy. She seems to get away with so much for a strict Catholic family. My theory, which is based on nothing but an educated guess, is that there were complications when her mother was pregnant with or during delivery. Peggy's a miracle child. She gets away with what she does, because her mother's view is, she's alive and healthy and that's all that matters. Or it could be nothing more deep than Peggy's the baby of the family.
I know we're not going to see it, but I would love to see what Bobby and Sally are like as adults, and what kind of relationship they have each other and thier parents.
Betty's brother is William. Pete's brother is Bud.
I think the Anita/Peggy relationship is meant as a mirror held by one sister to the other. To Anita, Peggy is the favorite; she gets away not with murder but with a pregnancy by a married man; she gets to live by herself and take the train to a glamorous job every day; she has all the perks and none of the responsibilities of most women of her era. She doesn't appreciate what her family does for her.
To Peggy, Anita is what she would be had she been stuck in a marriage with children. Anita is a conformist, who lets the restrictions of middle class Brooklyn keep her from achieving her full potential. Anita is what Peggy is escaping from. And yet, Anita is family, and without a family to close ranks around her, Peggy would not be where she is today and she knows that. Even Don Draper can't provide that kind of cover.
@Brenda, I think there is some truth to how Anita sees Peggy.
The refusal to even give physical love to her child, ie go and hold him when Anita says "aren't you going to say hello?". That made me see a frighteningly ugly and grotesque side of Peggy.
She sees her own feelings above that of her child when quite frankly, she could have kept the baby.
I have a love/hate relationship with Peggy because like Don, she puts her own feelings above that of her family.
No she could not have kept the baby. The family is already struggling with money and she could not have gone back to work and taken care of the kid. Advertising is notoriously demanding, with plenty of all nighters, and we got our demonstrations of how much work goes on outside of the time. Thought of the baby was depressing her to a point of mind freeze.
Besides she and Peter were already making eachother miserable, and not on purpose; there was no reason to be optomistic about that relationship. The fact that she is now uncomfortable around her sister's children is just human.
Back to the scene we have Anita accusing her husband of faking his ack pain because of how much he hates his job. These days we would say he is having psychosomatic symptoms. As some one who has suffered from chronic psychosomatic pains of my own I knw that saying it is just me feeling dramatic stress, but it does not make the pains less real. You cannot just get over it for the sake of your situation.
No, Peggy could not have kept the baby. In those days, giving it up for adoption was the best thing she could have done–for the baby & for herself.
Oh, she could have told Pete & PERHAPS have gotten some monetary support, although there was no way to prove the child was his. This probably would have ended his marriage & left him strapped for cash. The conflict would have also ended his feeling for Peggy that grew into the love he eventually confessed. And the scandal would have wrecked her career.
(The child Anita told her to say Hi to was not hers; it was Anita's.)
The refusal to even give physical love to her child, ie go and hold him when Anita says “aren’t you going to say hello?â€.
That wasn't Peggy's baby.
Thanks for the correction…but…I can't be convinced that Peggy is unselfish vis-a-vis her family. There is something in her manner of how she sees her mum and sister. Even when her mum asks her to light a candle for her father, she seems reluctant. Could be due to her religious ambivalence but really, how hard is it to suck it up and just do as your mum asks?
Jury's out for me on Peggy and her attitude towards her family.
@Bridget Burke, why does it matter that the conflict would have ended his feeling for Peggy? I think Pete's emotions in this context are irrelevant because their child's feelings and wellbeings should come first.
@aulelia When James Joyce’s mother was dying she wanted her son to get on his knees and pray, take part in the extreme unction, etc. He refused. He had already converted to athiesm; doing so would be against his conscience, his religion. It meant two very different thing to both people involved. And neither can betray their own faith, despite the fact that the son denied his mother her idea of holy closure, and she was being vindictive against his lifestyle.
I have never belonged to an organized religion. I can recognize the importance of ritual to people. but often when asked to take part in it find it contrived. Like it diminishes the meaning.
I think one of the elements of this tv series is MW showing the difference between how people behave in a society in a particular time period and who they REALLY are inside. I think Anita is an important part of the series in that she provides a contrast to Peggy in her home life. Anita behaves the way women did in that time. She conforms to more of the social norms. Peggy's reactions to Anita at home help the viewer see who Peggy really is.
It's not that Peggy is a selfish person, it's that she allows herself to feel human.
@Bridget Burke, why does it matter that the conflict would have ended his feeling for Peggy? I think Pete’s emotions in this context are irrelevant because their child’s feelings and wellbeings should come first.
The child was better off being adopted by a married couple who cared for each other and wanted a child. (Let's hope that the adoptive father hadn't been bribed into adopting–as Pete's wife & in-laws attempted.)
The alternative was being raised by a mother who had lost her chance at a career & a resentful father whose only contribution was child support checks. Perhaps she could have waited tables & paid her sister to babysit. The payments would have hardly supported them in style. Especially since Pete would probably have been paying alimony–even though ex-wifie had rich parents.
When Pete told Peggy he loved her, she said she could have forced him to be part of her life. But she knew that the outcome would not have been happy. The bright, independent Peggy that Pete came to love would not have existed.
She made the right choice for herself and for the baby. And for Pete, too.
how hard is it to suck it up and just do as your mum asks?
If it conflicts with your beliefs, it can be very difficult indeed. I'm not sure that's Peggy's problem at that point, tho. The whole story arc for Peggy in S2 is that having and adopting out her baby has had an effect on her and how she deals with it, first by denial (for example, avoiding church) and ultimately by assimilating it and expressing it (telling Pete). It's an ongoing process, you know, character development and story.
There wouldn't have been any reason to include the "light a candle" dialogue otherwise.