Comments on: Weiner on the opening titles; Lipp on Betty's night to remember

By: Rosie

Rosie — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 18:44:41 +0000

I found it kinda creepy how the women ogled Don, even though he was such a hunk as he put together Sallyâ€™s playhouse juggling beer and handtools, all sweaty and disheveled, cig dangling from his mouth!

Really? I didn't find that scene appealing one bit.

By: Roberta Lipp

Roberta Lipp — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 20:17:31 +0000

::excuses self while heading for some 'alone time'::

By: 60sdaughter

60sdaughter — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 19:50:34 +0000

Absolutely! It is surprising to me how she welcomed such comments. I found it kinda creepy how the women ogled Don, even though he was such a hunk as he put together Sally's playhouse juggling beer and handtools, all sweaty and disheveled, cig dangling from his mouth!

By: Roberta Lipp

Roberta Lipp — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 09:15:44 +0000

And you really see the difference in their marriage when you compare it to Marriage of Figaro. Francine admired Don ('that man!) and Betty smiled and fully accepted the praise.

By: 60sdaughter

60sdaughter — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 09:11:07 +0000

Thanks for this insightful essay on Betty for whom I have so much sympathy.

What really got me was a moment from the scene in Six Month Leave when Betty is in her bedroom with Sara Beth. I recognized how angry she was when S.B. declared, "Don's perfect." But I also noticed that when Sara Beth described how easy-to-please her own husband was, Betty choked up, saying "How sweet." All she wants is for her husband to love her!

By: Doug

Doug — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 18:39:21 +0000

I alway felt that the man in the opening credits is Don Draper. The episodes are leading up to his fall or collapse from his job and marriage. I get the feeling from the relax poise of Don sitting in the chair, that he needs this fall in order to rid himself of the demons has has accumlated, such as his identity, through his years since the war. Maybe the fall brings him back to his wife and family.

By: Anne B

Anne B — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 18:09:15 +0000

I'm not sure if the truth always sets people free. I think you have to be careful with it — and, as in a lot of other situations, know your audience.

I used the truth about my life to free myself from a bad relationship; that worked well. But my husband told the truth to his ex more than ten years ago, and now, years after the divorce, she is still angry.

All I can conclude is that some people like being angry. It suits them. In the case of these people, the truth doesn't set them free — it takes them from one place and puts them in another. It may be that this is where Betty is now: she's gone from not knowing what she was feeling, to being in a state that my shrink friend likes to call "flooded".

That's her term for feeling so overwhelmed by a stream of negative feelings that a person lashes out, gets defensive or abusive, or just withdraws. She or he is so overwhelmed by the number of negative feelings that she or he can't separate them from each other, and stops trying. All she or he can do is respond to the feelings: cry, shut down, stay in bed, push people away, drink, etc. This is where I see Betty right now.

The Draper marriage has not been strong for some time, and I think the show is doing a good job of showing the toll that takes on Don and Betty. Don isn't happy staying at the Roosevelt; he misses his kids and he wants Betty to take him back. But he doesn't want to open up to her, either. He still wants to be the guy he thinks she believes he's been, all these years. He doesn't know that she wants something different, and she's sure not talking.

But Betty isn't strong. She's kind of lost. She's still looking for evidence of Don's indiscretions — evidence she won't find. The longer she looks, the worse she will feel, as time passes and she hasn't found anything. Meanwhile, Betty is ignoring advice that can help her (get up, get out of the house, do something for yourself). She is acting less like a woman ready to stand on her own than a woman standing on her own last nerve. Even her kids are worried about her.

Will either of these people move on? Not quickly. Moving out and moving on is a very, very recent thing. I only remember the decade after the one this show depicts. What went on when real couples like this broke up was agonizing for both people and all their children. Agonizing, terribly slow, and somehow more painful for taking so much time.

Call them whatever else you want … but they weren't the good old days.

By: jw

jw — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 16:53:00 +0000

Brilliant analysis. Like I said in the open thread, I wonder if it won't be Don but Betty who will finally break free; she may very well become one of those women who redefined herself in the 1960s, left her husband (and maybe even the kids — how sad) and not want the marriage anymore, while Don realizes what he wants is a family, what he never had as a child. But he ruined it and maybe it's too late and Betty moves on.

By: Russen

Russen — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:39:40 +0000

With Six Month Leave it just made me feel even more sorry for Betty. When Don tells Roger, I am quite relieved to be kicked out of the house, my heart broke, and I couldnt believe he said that. I mean that was a slap in the face to Betty and their children. He was clearly stating he doesnt want to be there anymore, when Betty and the children want him to be. Don is an asshole, and like Joan told Roger, one day your going to lose something and regret it for the rest of you life. Could Joan also be forshadowing Don's future. My guess is that if Don wants a divorce from Betty, it will ruin him and he will sink lower and lower, and finally come to realize that he had it so good with Betty and the children. I am glad Betty is still holding her ground. She wants the truth! Like people say the truth shall set you free, maybe if Don tells her the truth everyone would be happy again like the pictures they showed in THE WHEEL episode. But if Don continues his streak of lying and deception, he will sink lower and lower to actually getting better, and Betty will come out strong and healthy.

By: Deborah Lipp

Deborah Lipp — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 11:23:26 +0000

What we saw in the final bar scene in Six Month Leave was Don wondering if it's possible for there to be any more, any better. He believes there is, he has the intense optimism of always moving forward, but he has no idea what form it could possibly take.

He is waiting for the catastrophe of his personality to seem beautiful again.